Christmas Merriment

The Gutoski James family enjoyed ALOT of Christmases this year.  We started the season with a Christmas dinner with Jean's extended family in mid December.  The next weekend it was Tom's extended family.  Then Christmas with Gus's immediate family on the 23rd, Dinner at Gus's Aunts on the 25th and Christmas with my mom and dad on the 27th.  Max and Darwyn got presents at EVERY event.  All I could think through all this merriment was that it was not the way Christmas was supposed to happen.  All of the present opening and yummy food and family was suppose to happen on one big incredibly exciting day.  There were suppose to be food and presents in excess, but only on that one day.

In spite of my reactions though, I was forced to question the notion that Christmas should be one big day of excess.  The kids seemed to enjoy each present much more on the days where they only got one or two.  At Christmas events with many gifts they opened the first gift and started playing with it happily.  Then they discovered that there were more presents and they went crazy ripping them apart, barely glancing at the gift and then tossing it aside.

My sister Teela noticed the same effect, and she commented that she and her husband were going to have to think carefully about how they wanted to set up Christmas in their household.  She thought perhaps they would have a few small gifts across a few different days leading up to Christmas, so her kids would enjoy each gift more.

My mother, on the other hand, was of the opinion that even though the kids don't play with each gift as much when they have many of them at once, they come back to them and enjoy each one just as much later.  What's more, getting all the gifts at once adds excitement.

So here is the question, do you enjoy Christmas more if you get each gift spaced out and savor it?  Or is it more fun to have it all at once, marvel in the excess and come back to enjoy it later?  I bet I could test that.....


And, of course, some photos....sorry they are mostly from my Christmas as we failed to take any other pictures.

Max and Kathrin making Christmas soaps

Bri and Darwyn opening Darwyn's Christmas eve present.  It is a tambourine
from Grandma Sandi, which Darwyn LOVED and shook violently (see video below).
Bri nearly sacrificed her glasses to the event.

Max and Grandpa doing the puzzle Max opened on Christmas eve.

Kathrin and Dennis joining us for the Christmas Eve feast.

Darwyn showing off her zebra costume from Grandma Sandi.  
Grandma made us look at the plump butt of that zebra costume
every two seconds....

Zebra gets a hug from a horsey.

Max and Appa (Bri and David's dog) playing chase.

Darwyn playing with her tambourine.

                         

Return of the barf-a-thon

After one day of respite, the barf-a-thon is back with a vengeance.  Darwyn and Max recovered quickly from their sickness a couple days ago -- they each threw up one or twice more after my previous post and settled down easily for bed that evening.

Greta and I went out for dinner last night while Gramma Jean watched the kids.  Then we took the kids to Waterloo Park to look at the lights with Anne, Sue, and Jeff.  All seemed well.  But later that night we were both in very rough shape.  Worse, our au pairs also caught the bug.  They were supposed to watch the kids for 8 hours today.  But instead they've been holing up in their room, trying to recover.

We've been struggling with the kids today.  Greta got up with the kids (as usual) and lasted until 9am on her own before she needed my help.  Fortunately, my sickness abated enough for me to take care of them for the late morning and early afternoon while Greta slept.  I'm still weak and frail, but I only threw up once last night and I'm in much, much better shape than Greta.  The kids are both fit as fiddles.

We're optimistic that we'll be able to sleep tonight and that we'll be in good shape tomorrow.

Searching for Christmas Past

A few days ago Max asked me why people get older.  I stumbled a lot over the question, not quite certain how to explain such a difficult concept to a two-year-old.  After mumbling a bunch of things about cells and telomeres, I gave up.  "To be honest Max, we don't really know why people get older.  But it is a good thing mostly, because you get to see and do so many new things.  I like it when you get older."

That was a half lie.  I don't exactly like him getting older.  It is true that I like to see him do new things, start preschool, learn to play imaginary games, make friends....but I also liked seeing him walk for the first time, watching him try his first solid foods and say his first words.  I console myself with the knowledge that I I still get to watch Darwyn do those things.  As she drinks from her bottle, I stare into her baby face and think 'what if she is my last baby?  Why can't I keep her like this forever?'

This weekend we set up our family's very first Christmas Tree.  In the morning Max and I ate breakfast beside it, talking about the different colours and ornaments while we ate.  "It doesn't have very many ornaments yet," I explain to Max, "just a few from when Mommy and Daddy were younger.  But every year we will make more ornaments for this tree." 

I continued staring at the lights.  From each branch of the tree hung a memory.. A Christmas orange peel in the shape of an elephant; Mom turning on the lights and carols in the morning, while I danced in the living room;  And the hours I spent rearranging each present under the tree, guessing at the contents of presents that weren't even mine and imagining how my family would react to each of my homemade gifts when they finally opened them.  I recognized those memories.  They were Christmas.  I hadn't seen Christmas in many years.

That evening I described each memory to Gus, trying to recapture the excitement I felt as a child.  "We just don't feel that way as adults anymore," I complained.  "We can't recapture that uncontainable excitement.  As a child Christmas ends and you are so disappointed because you know it will be an eon before it is back again.  But you get older and Christmas comes and you think...'Oh.  Is it here again already?'  And each year you discover it is not as exciting as it was the year before, but you go through the motions because it is supposed to mean so much.  Because you can remember when it was magical."

Gus confided in me that he doesn't understand why we continue with stupid traditions marked by consumerism, apathy, work and social pressure.  He is accused of being a Grinch, but I'm convinced that he is only verbalizing something we all know is true.  Christmas changes.  We grow up and it gets...different.  Every year we go through the motions, a bunch of adults sitting around the living room (we didn't set up the tree because it was too much work) opening gifts.  We persist, hoping that we will find Christmas in each box, but it is missing.  Until now.

Max dances in front of our tree.  He reaches down and shakes a present.  "I think it is a truck," he says.  "Honey, that one is for Grandma, I don't think she likes trucks as much as you do."  Max picks up one addressed to him, "but this one is a truck," he tells me.  Gus smiles at Max and looks at the unwrapped box that came in the mail from Wendy and Mike.  "We should wrap that," he says.

Darwyn sits in front of the tree grabbing at a decoration made of bells.  It is pretty ugly, but she delights at the jingle it makes.  'Just wait,'  I think, 'Christmas will be so exciting when you are just a little older.'

Greta in front of the Christmas Tree

Max helping to decorate the tree

Max's branch.  It took all my will power not to "fix" it.

Darwyn playing with a decoration.

4am barf-a-thon

Max woke up crying at 3:30 this morning, his bed and himself covered in puke.  I cleaned the carpet, matress, and threw Max's clothes and bed sheets in the washing machine.

Mom eventually came up to see what all the fuss was about.  She took over with Max so I checked on Darwyn, who had been fussing on-and-off for a while.  She was asleep when I went in... lying face down in her own vomit.  Another clean-up job.

Both kids threw up twice in the middle of the night.  We gave Max 1/4 gravol.  Greta also took a dose, but we ran out so I had to rely on my immune system alone.

It was 5:30 before everyone was back in bed.  Max seems fit as a fiddle this morning, but Darwyn has thrown up three more times since waking at 9am.  She took a short nap this morning and is currently understandably lethargic.  Neither Greta nor I have thrown up yet and we both feel fine.

Mom! They trapped a baby in this plush toy!

We recently (or not so recently...it took me awhile to post this) borrowed a large plush block toy for Darwyn from Sue and Jeff.  The toy has a large shape on each side and sings an obnoxious song to go with each one.  Darwyn had little interest in the shapes except for the triangle.  Behind the triangle was a mirror which Darwyn found incredibly fascinating.  I could literally hear what must be going on in her brain, "Mom!  There is a baby in this box......I think I will try to eat it."  At which point Darwyn would bend forward mouth open, and then pull back abruptly again.  "Mom!  This baby is trying to eat me!"  And so it went for a whole hour.  We documented the event with many pictures and a video (see below).

There is something in here.

Kisses for the baby.

Oww...My face!

This is trippy mom.

Help!  I'm trapped in this box.

Shaky-Bond-Speare 2000--2012

Yesterday Gus and I said goodbye to a dear friend.  We finally made the trip to the vet to euthanize Shaky.  It was extremely difficult.  I'm finding it really hard to feel okay about the choice.

Shaky started out as my sister Heidi's dog.  His full name was Shaky-Bond-Speare, a compromise meant to satisfy my sister's desire to name him Shakespeare with her son's insistence that he be called James Bond.  I'm not sure the resulting blend was the most elegant of names, but it always seemed to suit him.

Shaky came to live with me when he was nearly 7 years old and we have spent the last 6 years together.  He was a faithful companion.  To him I was second to none but the ball...and the stick... and well really anything projectile.  But if nothing was moving, then he liked me quite well.  Shaky was quite a calm and reserved dog.  He bestowed kisses sparingly and would only offer his bum up for pets.  He had unfailing energy and could outlast even the most determined ball throwers.  I'm pretty sure if we had bought him a pitching machine, the machine would have died before Shaky took a rest.

I remember shortly after I got together with Gus, we brought Shaky up to Gus's parents' river.  I proudly declared to Gus's dad, Tom, that Shaky could not be bested in a game of fetch.  Determined to prove me wrong, Tom sat down with a book, a beer and the launcher and threw the ball all afternoon.  At the end of it he said, "well my beer is done, my book is done, my arm is ready to fall off and he is still going.  I can't believe it."  To add insult to injury Shaky wandered over, dropped the ball at our feet and looked up expectantly, as though he had just spent the last 5 hours having a nice rest.  This was Shaky.

In recent years, Shaky started to slow down.  He couldn't see well anymore and he had developed arthritis in his hips.  It was very sad for all of us to see him having trouble keeping up.  He still enjoyed sitting quietly in the yard on sunny days, surveying his territory and keeping all invading squirells at bay.  He was still up for a good game of fetch, but couldn't see the ball well anymore.  On most throws he simply lost the ball and when he did see it he would lope slowly after it to retrieve it.  He still came for pets, but he'd growl and snap at anyone who came too near his arthritic hips.  Like it or not, we were starting to lose our boy.

After much delaying we made the terrible decision that eventually all dog owners face; we put Shaky down.  One day, I hope I will look at it as the last nice thing we did for a good friend.  Right now it just hurts.  We might have put it off for a few more months, maybe a year, but this way he never had to stop playing fetch.  He never got tired out.  He played till the very last day.

Goodbye Shaky.  We will miss you.

Shaky lost his ball int he river.  Again.

Tug with another dog is rare.  Catching it on camera is special.

Darwyn crawls

Darwyn has started crawling...I'm a little late posting about it.  She did her first awkward crawling about a month ago, shortly after she turned 7 months old.  I've posted a video of her seasoned crawling! Sorry it is sideways.

It has been a lot of fun watching Darwyn crawl.  I really feel that when babies start to crawl so much more of their personality is revealed.  What has become obvious about Darwyn's personality is her quiet determination.  As a non-moving infant she was so sunny and undemanding...determination did not seem a large part of who she was.  Now that she can move, however, she is capable of pursuing her own interests and she does so with vigor.  She is especially interested in learning to pull herself up to standing and attempts this feat at every opportunity.  She has also been determined to learn to crawl over objects and to walk.  She loves to hold your hand and march across the floor (see video below).  She attempts to learn these skills with a single mindedness I do not recall in Max.  When we are out, Darwyn is quite gregarious.  She crawls up to strangers, climbs up onto their laps and gives them a winning smile.  Then she tries to go for their necklace.....

Gaining a room, putting the kids back into separate rooms

A while ago we experimented with sleeping Darwyn and Max together in the same room.  While some nights went quite smoothly, the experiment was mostly a failure.  If one kid starts crying then the other may not wake up.  But when we hear crying on the monitor at night, we leap out of bed and run upstairs at top speed to soothe the crying child before he/she has a chance to awaken the other.  Doing cry-it-out, or just lazily "giving her a few minutes" is out of the question.  Besides, Max's room is also a play room and storage centre for essential baby gear.  When one child is sleeping the stuff is inaccessible.  Darwyn has long since been moved into a different room.

Unfortunately, there are no more rooms.  Her bed is currently in our office, which means that we no longer have an office.  As if on cue, Vibhu has told us that he will move out of our house at the beginning of December, freeing up his precious bedroom for baby Darwyn.  Vibhu's decision may not be coincidental -- I think he was put off by the fact that we re-located the potty and change station into our shared bathroom.  In any case, he's been a great sport about everything.  Under different circumstances I'd be sad to see him go, but we really need his room!

Semi-monthly photo update: September-October 2012

Some new photos to complement Greta's post of Fall photos.

We've been crazy busy lately.  Our children are growing up and we've failed to blog about it.  Things are finally starting to slow down a bit.  My major deadlines at work are now past.  Our family took a hit so I could work hard while on parental leave.

There are more photos from the past two months beyond what's in this post.  They should appear on this blog shortly. We'll try to post more frequently during the lead-up to the new year.

Max would never miss an opportunity to help with renovation.  Ripping out drywall is especially fun.

What childhood would be complete without a tea-party for stuffed animals in the kitchen?

 

 

Baby in a basket!

Darwyn handles her food herself, which is unusual at such a young age.  It's great for us because it keeps her occupied for 20 solid minutes at each meal.

Cousin Viola looking cute...

...and silly!

 

 

Some cute costumes at Halloween.  The froggy in the middle is Max's friend Elliot.  Elliot's baby sister Emily is not in this picture.  Unfortunately, this is the best shot we got.

Product placement whilst carving a squash.

 

 

 

Dennis took this photo.  He told me we should title it "Darwyn versus the pureed squash."
I said, "that looks like Darwyn versus Dennis and Darwyn won." (Notice there is a much smaller smear of yogurt on her face.  Darwyn likes yogurt.)

Fall photos

Just a photo update.  Enjoy!

Darwyn spent the entire walk at the river with her head perpendicular to her
body staring up at the orange leaves.  Eventually she fell asleep.

Oh Canada

Max loves Darwyn a little too much.

The dangers of letting your children associate with the relatives.

Max and Anne spent a while helping Grandma plant flowers.  Between the two of them I don't think there were any flowers left on the plant by the time it was in the ground!

The clan enjoying a big Thanksgiving dinner.  Even Darwyn ate with us.
Her favorite was Grandma Sandi's candied squash.  

Darwyn wears her new sleeper from Grandma Sandi.

Fall at the river.

The leaves were not as good as Grandma Sandi's candied squash.  Who knew?